The "TRUTH BEARER Vision of love-not-force" deals with some very mature principles
of profound, selfless and giving, Christ-like love. As such, for many who
have not ever seen or heard of such depths of mature principles,
it can be very difficult for such ones to receive.
An example of this kind of difficulty such ones have may usually be
found by observing some reactions
to this ministry's preaching about the Scriptural doctrine regarding
to covenant breaking. This is particularly so when it comes to the
matter of men who have covenanted with their wives, wherein they had promised that they
would "forsake all others", then such men later seeking to unilaterally break that
covenant because these men found out about Christian Polygamy
and suddenly then want to have "more wives". (This is also usually
made with the dichotomy being expressed by such men in the self-made claim
that these men had supposedly
"grown more in Christ" even though their wife supposedly had not
---even though the fact that such men would willingly become
unilateral covenant breakers would contradict such claims of "growth
Revelation 21:8 (the latter being with regard
to "all liars" being "cast into the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone")
make it clear that covenant breaking is a "worthy of death" sin,
the known "judgment of God". Because of that, this ministry preaches that
a man must keep his covenant to his wife. If a man used the words
in his marriage covenant wherewith he pledged that he
would "forsake all others", then, because he is called to be a man
whose word ever be true (as Christ's Word is ever true and would never
unilaterally break covenant with us in the Churches ---Hallelujah!),
the man is to surely bind himself to his own word. It is not an issue of his wife
binding him, but his own integrity holding himself accountable
to his own word. (And he cannot later claim he supposedly had "meant
something else" when he said those words, because a man of integrity
knows that he knew what the words, "forsake all others",
meant as he said those words to his wife in their marriage covenant.)
A man of integrity does not and would not (unrepentantly) commit
the Romans 1:31b,32 "worthy of death" sin of covenant breaking.
With that understood, though, NEW covenants may and can certainly be made.
But doing so must only be that the parties to the original covenant
mutually give their uncoerced, freely-given GENUINE ASSENT (sincere,
unpressured agreement) to what would be called a "re-negotiation"
of the covenant, to make a NEW covenant.
And that's what the "TRUTH BEARER Vision of love-not-force" preaches.
That is, by a man walking and growing in selflessly-giving Christ-like
love to his wife, he would that he only help her come to embrace Christian Polygamy
of her own free will, loving her and helping her to willingly and joyfully
embrace Christian Polygamy by love and not by force.
(Hence this ministry's term, "love-not-force".)
The matter of covenant breaking doctrine from Romans 1:31b,32 (and
Revelation 21:8) absolutely affirm and demonstrate the Scriptural basis of this.
But aside from the preaching to not so sin, there is a further, far
deeper and more mature matter as to why a man must never be a unilateral
covenant breaker with his wife. And this is what tends to not be
understood by some with less maturity, or even, of course, the outright
carnal and/or ungodly men.
Namely, a man wanting to just be able to FORCE polygamy on his
first wife (even if he might potentially express other intents),
such a man with less maturity, or even some who are ungodly, mistakenly
misperceive what the "TRUTH BEARER Vision
of love-not-force" is "all about"; they misperceive why the
issue of TRUE covenant breaking doctrine is so vitally important.
Examples of such mistaken misunderstandings can be seen whenever
someone might react to this preaching of love-not-force about
covenant breaking doctrine, by their declaring such misperceiving
statements as follows:
- "This preaching 'gives a wife a veto' power over the man"
(which the mature among us understand it never does);
- "This preaching gives the wife authority or final say over the husband"
(which the mature among us understand it never does).
The truth is, love-not-force is about far more mature principles of love, and
authority and submissiveness, than about which most people are all that familiar. And
that's why such misperceptions can and certainly do occur.
Beyond the importance of preaching with forewarning of the obvious consequences
of the "judgment of God" (again, as per Romans 1:31b,32,
Revelation 21:8) for those who teach others to self-justify covenant breaking,
this ministry preaches the importance of this covenant breaking doctrine in the matters of
love-not-force as a means by which a man may powerfully walk IN SUCH AUTHORITY.
To try to help clarify this all for anyone who may still not yet
the following parable might be able to help explain this more
fully. (This was originally written and posted on the Friends and Fellowhelpers email listservs, by the Founder of this organization, on April 4, 2001.)
The Parable of the Bricks
There are two men.
The first man picks up a brick in his left hand and holds it. We'll call this
"the authority" brick.
He then takes another brick in his right hand and holds it, too. We'll call this
"the submitted one" brick.
With each hand holding each brick, he tries to join the two together "as one". He tries
to join "the authority" brick on the left with "the submitted one" brick on the
Once the two are touching, he tries to force the two together to be joined "as one",
trying to push them against each other.
Once he thinks he's done it, he lets go of the right brick, "the submitted one" brick.
Immediately, "the submitted one" brick drops to the ground. It does not stay
joined to "the authority" brick.
He tries again, this time, trying to use all his might. Same thing happens.
"The submitted one" brick does not remain bonded with "the authority" brick, and
it drops again.
He picks up "the submitted one" brick yet again and then starts slamming the two
bricks together in trying to force the two bricks to join "as one".
Both of the bricks start to chip. The more he tries to force "the
submitted one" brick to join with "the authority" brick, the more they actually start to
break apart and crumble on their own.
Being now frustrated, he gives up, blaming "the submitted one" brick, and just
leaving the broken bricks in a crumbled heap.
Now, the second man does similarly, picking up a brick in his left-hand, which we
also call "the authority" brick, and picking up another brick in his right hand,
which we again also will call "the submitted one" brick. He, too, will be trying to
join "the submitted one" brick to "the authority" brick to be "as one".
However, this second man does things differently.
Before he picks up "the submitted one" brick, he first tenderly and
appropriately applies some mortar to the side of "the authority" brick in his
left hand. He makes sure that there is sufficient mortar applied to one entire
side of "the authority" brick in his left hand. Once he has done that, he then
carefully picks up "the submitted one" brick in his right hand, and gently
places it up beside "the authority" brick (using the same side of "the submitted
one" brick as that of "the authority" brick's side with the mortar on it)
at where the mortar had been spread. He gently squeezes the two together with the
mortar being between them.
He knows that he cannot let go of the pair just yet, as the mortar is still soft
and needs some time to set. So, he stands there, holding the two bricks joined
together with his hands, holding it all there for the necessary time for the mortar
to solidify and bond.
After the necessary time passes, the man removes his right-hand, while still
holding "the authority" brick in his left-hand.
He rejoices as he sees that "the submitted one" brick is now fully bonded and
strongly joined "as one" with "the authority" brick. "The submitted one" brick
is now being held up and supported fully and completely by its bond with "the
authority" brick, as the man is only holding "the authority" brick in his left
hand, and not holding "the submitted one" brick at all.
He has succeeded! The two bricks have become joined "as one"!
That's the end of this parable.
The Parable Explained
Who is the first man?
It is a man trying to apply FORCE. It doesn't work, and he doesn't know why.
Who is the second man?
It is a man applying love-not-force. It does work, and he does know why.
And what is the mortar?
And that's the point of all of this!
The "TRUTH BEARER Vision of love-not-force" is about teaching how to apply the
mortar between "the authority" (husband) and "the submitted one" (wife),
that of building and securing TRUST as the ever-holding strong bond, as
they ever be then joined "as one".
TRUST is the bond, the mortar, between the two.
Without TRUST, there is no bonding between "the authority" and "the submitted
So, when preaching the "TRUTH BEARER Vision of love-not-force", it is not that
this preaching is supposedly without understanding about authority and submissiveness
issues in doctrine. Contrariwise! It is about far more deeply and maturely understanding
such issues far more deeply than most have ever understood, indeed!
The reason why covenant breaking doctrine is so important (beyond the issue of
sin, of course) is that covenant breaking is that of word-breaking.
And word-breaking destroys and can even remove TRUST between "the authority" and
"the submitted one".
Yet, if a man will instead refuse to allow himself to
enter into this (Romans 1:31b,32) "worthy of death" sin
of covenant breaking, or refuse to allow himself to even advocate the sin of coveant
breaking at all, before his wife, if he will instead hold himself out to be a
man whose word is always and ever true, then he is building TRUST, whereby the
wife can then bond even more strongly to him.
And as that bond in TRUST grows and strengthens together, they
can grow together even in Christian Polygamy --- love-not-force works,
because it builds and establishes that necessary bond of TRUST!
But if a man will instead keep insisting that he can or may supposedly
self-justify himself as being a "covenant breaker" in his wife's eyes
(whether he play a word-game manipulation of trying
to say that "forsake all others" didn't mean what
he meant it when he said it, or any other untrustworthy deceptive
kind of tactic like that),
then he is only removing that
TRUST. He is removing that "mortar". He is making it even that much more difficult, even
possibly looking as if being impossible (for some wives if they have been so deeply, deeply hurt),
for "the submitted one" to bond with him, to believe that he even has any "authority".
And that's why the more mature ones among us in Christian Polygamy
who understand what the true principles
of love-not-force are really "all about" already know and understand that this
is not about such things as "giving a wife a supposed veto or final authority"
which she does not have. Rather, it is understood by the mature ones as being
about a man binding himself to his own
word, that his own word be ever true, so that thereby (aside from not falling
into the Romans 1:31b,32 sin) he be able to start applying the "mortar", building
the TRUST, so that his wife would indeed bond to him and remain strong.
Indeed, for once the "mortar" is set, the bond is so strong that it would take a
sledgehammer to then even begin to break that bond! Hallelujah!
TRUST is the bond.
And yet, for a man to be willing to be a "covenant breaker", he proves himself to
be one who cannot be trusted, proving to his wife that she cannot trust him.
Thereby does such a man destroy and remove TRUST between him and his wife, removing the bond, removing the
By preaching the TRUTH BEARER Vision of love-not-force, this ministry is preaching a far
more mature set of principles than about which most people have learned, all in
just trying to help husbands to apply the "mortar", so as to bring strength in the
bond of their marriage, even as they would then grow together even in Christian
And that's how, by a man walking in the principles of the "TRUTH BEARER Vision of love-not-force",
he keeps his word ever true, his wife sees that his word IS always true, she
can then TRUST him, can TRUST that he TRULY is indeed following the example
as that of Christ (as per Ephesians 5:25), and they can then grow
together in love unto her even willingly and joyfully embracing Christian
Polygamy on her own, by love-not-force.
© April 04, 2001, TruthBearer.org
P.O. Box 765, O.O.B., ME 04064
If you want to learn more about the "TRUTH BEARER Vision of love-not-force", then you will want to
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